There was a deep silence across the room like a storm
was about to come. No sound could be heard except that coming from my
over-sized shoes while walking to and fro. I could barely walk wearing
an over-sized lab coat and big black formal shoes. With a wooden ruler in my one
hand tapping on my other hand repeatedly and a stern look on my face I looked
over to my class. They were terrified; unable to move or speak they stared me
with anticipation. Suddenly I stopped, turned towards the black roller board
hung on the wall and struck the ruler where “A=” was written in chalk in barely
legible handwriting. I yelled with authority in my voice “A for?”. The topper
of my class, my mom replied in a poetic tone as I had taught her to speak, “A
for Apple”. I shouted in appreciation, “very good!”
We all had huge ambitions when we were kids. Not that I am too old but yeah! I don’t dream of becoming a doctor, teacher and pilot together. (Yes, I wanted to become all three.)
Ah! Sweet were those days when we weren’t aware of career jargons like degree, placement, job, entrance exams, eligibility etc. We just wore our dad’s lab coat and hung mom’s purse on the shoulder and became whatever we wanted. (That would be 5 year old me)
I
was extremely ambitious when I was small, wanted to become a doctor because
living things fascinated me. My mother is a teacher so that was also in the ‘list’.
Besides that, looking up to the tiny planes leaving behind fading white smoke
in the blue sky made me think if someone could fly that thing, he would be
invincible. So that’s what I dreamt of. But then ‘cruel’ realities came out of
nowhere. Growing up in a cut-throat competitive world, I learn what the world
taught me and I chose paths which were tried, tested and conventional. I turned
out fine but when I look back, I see a fearless little girl with big dreams in
her sparkling dreamy eyes asking me a question “Hey, how come you forgot me?”
Freedom
of dreaming leaves us somewhere and practical realities of life grab our hand
and dragged us towards survival. (I came up with that line myself!) That’s what
everyone is pitching for. Trying to get a job or a degree for a job so that
they can pile up enough money to survive. Well “survival” is a bit of an
exaggerated term; actually we all just want a lavish house with AC in every
room and a big car. Anything less than that would cause embarrassing taunts and
looks by worthless neighbors and distant relatives. In the struggle of
understanding the worldly code of conduct, we don’t realize when our dreams lose our sight.
Well moving on, what’s done is done, until unless we have a time machine to go back
and change our past decisions. As we drift through the crowd, we can still bring
back the dreamy kid who got lost in the way by doing what we love to do. Our
work should be interesting and engaging enough that we do not realize an hour pass
while working. As the macho-man Salman Khan says “Wo jeena bhi koi jeena hai
jisme koi KICK na ho”. The nature of the “kick” might be different for
different people. We need to find our unique “kick” source (which should be
legal at least, unlike what Salman does in the movie ‘Kick’).
If your work
makes you look at the clock frequently, it’s time for a change. Going against
the flow for a while will require tremendous courage but it’s the prize one has
to pay for actual happiness. Because according to a popular belief “Haar kar jeetne wale ko baazigar kehte
hain!!"
So, what did you dream to become and how did things turn out for you?
C'mon! tell me. Then we can cry together :D
C'mon! tell me. Then we can cry together :D
